Cabradine

Being a republican presidential candidate is the easiest gig in the world. All you have to do is pledge allegiance to the wealthiest one percent, then trick the most gullible forty-nine percent into voting against their own interests by convincing them that the disappointments in their lives are the fault of other people who don’t much look like them. Just like that, without needing a plan or an idea, competence or coherence, you have half the country voting for you before you’ve opened your mouth.

Then you spread enough lies about your democrat opponent to make him appear slightly less than perfect, which will convince enough liberals to stay home on election day - and no matter how stunningly incompetent and corrupt you are, you win.

Once you’re in office, so long as you give the wealthiest one percent whatever they ask for, you get to spend the rest of the time carrying out any personal agenda you want. Want to start a land war to embarrass your dad’s old nemesis, so the vice president’s private corporation can make money rebuilding everything you knocked down? Feel like bringing scientific research to a halt because it’s against your own religious fanaticism? Want to appoint your cleaning staff to the supreme court so they can continue carrying out your personal agenda for decades to come? Go for it. The one percent who own you don’t care, the rest of the people who voted for you are too stupid to know any better, and the people who didn’t vote for you are so aghast that they stop paying attention.

But wait, it gets easier. The wealthy will insist that you fully deregulate the economy from day one so they can steal from it. But because the economy typically won’t implode until a few years after you sabotaged it, you might even get a second term without trying. And if the economy does threaten to implode before your first term is up, just start a “preventive land war” while suggesting that anyone in congress who doesn’t back the call to arms is a communist traitor. The spending related to the war should cover up your economic sabotage until you’re well into your second term.

Once your eight years are up, you can rewrite your legacy after the fact by conning the most gullible forty-nine percent into blaming your economic sabotage on the presidents who came before and after you - even though the guy before you left you with a perfect economy, and the guy after you has made significant progress in undoing your sabotage.

Are we really going to let this happen again, from 2012 to 2020? There’s no way to make the most gullible forty-nine percent any less brainwashed than they are; they’ve already lined up to vote for whichever monster gets the republican nomination. The only way to avoid another eight year nightmare is for sane liberals and moderates to get out and vote for Obama whether they think he’s perfect or not. Any liberals who stay home on election day in 2012 are even more to blame than idiot republican voters for the damage done by any republican candidate who gets into office.